Saturday, November 29, 2014

Thanksgiving Day2014

Thanksgiving Day. A day we set aside nationally to corporately thank the Lord for His many blessings as a nation. Much like Christmas, and Easter, it has become secularized and means little more to most folk than a day off and time to spend with family. For those of us who are privileged to know the God of the Bible on a personal level, (as it is common to know all ABOUT Him, without knowing Him at all) it is a day for a heart full of gratitude and bellies full of feasting. It was always my favorite day of the year, as I remember my large family gathering around the oak table as a child, with much laughter and the tinkle of the fine crystal Mom so rarely put out.
As an adult, I cooked my first Thanksgiving dinner just a couple of weeks before my first son, Matt, was born. I had no idea how to do it, and was 12 hours from my Mother’s help, so I had to just wing it. We had company from Reno and elsewhere, but neither of the wives had ever fixed a turkey and were afraid to try, so I wasn’t too intimidated. The results were satisfactory and over the years our traditions were perfected. Now the kids are in another state and Randyman and I are here alone, in the little stone house on the ranch, every year, every holiday. Sometimes I make a turkey with all the fixin’s but this year, due to my leg problems, we will just roast a chicken in the clay pot. As I reminisce I remember fondly the many Thanksgivings spent alone with my boys. Their dad always wanted the overtime so he would take extra shifts as a deputy Sheriff and the boys and I would play board games, ride horses, and do jigsaw puzzles, then eat ourselves silly on the dinner I would have spent days in the making, that was on the table. Their dad would either show up, or get leftovers. They were good times and I cherish the memories as they grew up much too fast and I still feel as though my arms are now empty. I suppose once a mother has held her child on her lap, the need for that feeling never goes away, no matter how old they are.

One thing that is constant, since we moved here, is that I am sincerely grateful for all the Lord has done in my life. This year has been one of extreme pain and loss, yet, I would walk through it again if it made the difference between walking with Him or going back to life when I did not know Him. He is worth it and I also know He will use my pain and loss, that it will not be wasted.

I am also thankful for all of you out there, my readers, FB friends and online friends I will never meet on this side of heaven. You have encouraged me and lifted me up, when I felt so isolated out here without much human contact. Your comments, letters and offerings have been much appreciated.

I want to also say, I miss a couple of people out there, that used to cheer me with our conversations. L-x, Dx and Danile, I hope you have a fantastic day and continue to shine His light on all of those he sends to rub shoulders with you. I wish there was still a way to chat with you, but I guess all good things must come to an end. God bless you all, and your families and have a wonderful Thanksgiving today and always.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Mid November 2014

Another hard day. Everyday brings choices. We try to make the best ones we can, some have been good, some bad, some glorious and some painful. I'm grateful for a man who has a heart not just for me, but for our animals. He's been a gentle rock for us to lean on and I wish I could show him how much he is appreciated. He is the best choice I ever made in my life. He's been more patient and kinder than I could ever ask anyone to be, as he has tended to not just our outdoor critters, but to me, in my infirmity and to my much loved Golden Retriever, Cider.

As many of you know, my dear and faithful Cider was failing. At 14 yr, he suddenly started aging and quickly went downhill. Keeping him with us as long as possible, he finally awoke early one morning whimpering and unable to get up. We made the difficult decision to put him down as we knew he was never going to get better and we did not want him to suffer. He kept his attention on me whenever he was wakeful, as I had given him a strong painkiller that made him drowsy as well as kept him comfortable for the long drive to the vet. As long as he could see me, he was quiet, but when I was not in his line of sight, he cried pitifully. He died with me holding his paw. My heart is so broken I wonder if it will ever mend. He was my best friend aside from TheMan, but unlike TheMan, he was my constant shadow, keeping me company everywhere I went, from the bathroom, to long rides across the ranch. His absence is felt far more deeply than I ever imagined it could and as this has been a difficult year already, with much pain and much loss, I am kind of reeling with it all.

On a happier note, as I have been wheelchair bound for over 2 months after a joint injection gone wrong, TheMan bought me a powerchair so I am no longer trapped in a recliner 24/7. I am able to do a lot more towards taking care of myself and am able to resume making the soy tarts, candles, body butter and with some difficulty, soaps for the online store. I've had to be creative about things, such as spot cleaning carpetsbut I have found that if I can get my sock off, I can spray the rug, use my toes to sort of agitate the carpet fibers, then pick up a rag with self same toes to blot up the spot. Works pretty good. Who knows what other skills I might discover?

The Maremmas' little flock has thinned down considerably, as the 9 lambs all went to sale and SushiMoo and her wild heifer are out with the ranch cattle for the winter, they’ve only the 4 ewes, ram and a handful of old chickens to care for. Coyote activity has been pretty heavy around here, though, so their job hasn’t actually gotten any easier. They’ve done a great job and since putting up the radio fence, they are content to stay within the boundaries we set for them, which makes me feel they are all much safer. I miss seeing them, as they are outside working and I am inside, waiting for surgery. I can occasionally catch a glimpse of my old horse, Mister, through the bathroom window, but it’s always brief.

The ducks are the main entertainment, as they are in the yard and I can sometimes see them through the window, splashing and playing in their water or grubbing for whatever they find in the lawn, even though its been below freezing for a week or more. The poor blind drake, Magoo, has been a pretty good sport as the others seem to find it amusing to ‘ditch’ him and run behind something impassable then quack at him to get him to run into stuff. Kids can be so cruel.
One of them has begun to lay eggs, so I am anxious to try them out.

I’m still awaiting word on when they can do the knee replacement for me as there have been some complications, but I am anxious as it means I will be walking again soon after and can resume my life.

We have a new grandbaby down south and hope to see family soon, but again, all depends on the Dr.‘s decision.

Meanwhile, I hope you all have a fabulous Thanksgiving holiday. Hug your loved ones, both human and non as they are not with us here forever.

Visit the etsy store for Ranch Rustics soaps/candles/body butter. They make great Christmas gifts and stocking stuffers, but order early, before inventory runs out!